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Sometimes, I just hoped that life will be much simpler. Such that there's less worries, less problems. I wonder sometimes, what's beyond my always cheerful smile. I always described myself as a happy-go-lucky person, iszit something that I alr labelled myself such that i forced myself to be happy always, or it really came from my heart. I used to think that I'm strong, always putting on a brave front. How many can actually see wat's deep within me? Even myself can't sometimes.

Not trusting ppl easily sometimes may be gd, u nid not worry so much, u save urself from getting hurt, u live in ur own world, protected. Who doesn't like to be protected by another one? What worse is when those who are supposed to be ur protector, hurt u themselves. When u finally opened the door to ur heart for them, they messed it up n left without looking back. So u cleaned up e mess urself coz of e stupid decision to open e door for them, n decided to shut e door even tighter this time. Nt allowing ppl to enter easily again, because u've spent majority of ur time clearing e mess, u wouldn't take e risk of another one messing it up again. N e one suffering will be urself, nt those who made a mess of ur life, they get away with excuses for themselves. What for treating them well all e while, what for making them another big part of ur life.

U can't forget e pain, even if u can forgive.



This is life@
12:49 AM
♥Tuesday, December 30, 2008





Finally my server's okay(: now i can blog n do whatever i want(: okay at least life is more meaningful like this.

On 26th, I experienced my first blackout exp!! It was omg i understand why e term is blackout!! That morning i woke up at 8am n i dun wanna slp alr. Then at 10 plus am i decided to get breakfast from LJS! When i reached entertainment centre, i think LJ should be not running anymore. So i get mac breakfast instead. Okay then i walked back to e bus stop after getting e breakfast. While standing at e bus stop, my ears suddenly exp something like a serious ear blocked! Then my vision started to blur n only seeing patches of black. When i wanted to sit down 238 came along so i decided to get home asap as i nv exp something like that b4. I stood in e bus, holding on to e bar, my head gets heavier n e vision gets darker n darker, until when i nxt regain my conscious i was alr on e floor of e bus! Then e bus driver plus an uncle helped me up from e floor n someone stood up to let me have e seat. I tot i was alright alr as my vision starts to get clearer n all, after i alighted i crossed e bridge! At e flat part of e bridge, e black patches came again, n i dun dare to cross anymore as i'm quite sure that if i were to cross i'll be rolling down e bridge n most probably in hospital now. Haha okay, three aunties saw me standing there n they supported me awhile n though i'm like semi conscious, i can hear them talking just that i dun hav e strength to talk. After that they asked another two men who past by us to help me down e bridge! N I sat at e bus stop for awhile. E three of them were very nice(: seriously very nice! They accompanied me all e while till i slowly regain my vision, n finally able to talk. One helped me called home n another one offered to go back to her hse which is nearby to get me something to eat. Lol okay i swear i'm NOT ON DIET! Yea my mum came to bring me home from e bus stop. I just realised that there's many ppl in that bus stop looking at me when i turned back to go home.

Rested awhile n went to e doc! Lol e doc part was very funny!! But a bit weird to say it here lol. So yupp, I'm rather okay now, just that still a little bit weak n e left side of my head like got a bump, which is i dunno whether i knocked it against e floor of e bus or something.

I'm grateful to e bus driver and e uncle on e bus, e two guys who helped me down e bridge, n of coz e three very helpful n nice aunties(: I'm unlucky and lucky at e same time that day. Okay it was overall a very scary exp n pls dun let it happen again! XD



This is life@
10:41 AM
♥Sunday, December 28, 2008





I guess i'm one lazy blogger! Lol but actually nth much is going on in my life that's sort of worth a mention! Coz its e same old thing always, tv, com n bed. Sometimes going out with friends make those days more interesting! Today i'm supposed to go out n watched twilight! But as i woke up n as usual tried to wear my specs, i opened n it broke at e side!! Went to optician, she said its e first time she saw such case! Beyond cure le! So i had to change new specs, cancel my outing today n stay at home! Then I gotta go to tmr's CO farewell with a blur vision! WTH!!! N e specs is $180!! N i still haven find a job yet! So now I REALLY NEED A JOB!!! But for goodness sake a job is so hard to find! N i dunno how to start writing resume lol, trying to do something proper now but with my vision blur now i've decided to do it another time! Another thing is i've finally succumbed to peer pressure n created facebook! lol but i'm still so noob okay whatever! Life is really bored! N I WANT A JOB!!!



This is life@
2:30 PM
♥Friday, December 19, 2008





Woahhh!! Sunday(:

N i just realised that i haven been blogging!! Lol lazy to use com in a way. Yup i'm gonna start from wed(:

At ard 10 plus i think, met up with sx at pp bus station to go to clarke quay. E poor girl forgot e cam n had to go back again after she's on busXD N she's sweating so much when i saw her. Haha but that night was hot. Lol yea we dint go for prom but we went post prom! haha n by that time jess was alr there. lol ps. Walked to butter factory, we got stucked at somewhere really damn near e place(we just had to walk straight) n tot we're lost! Then saw huirong they all n walked with them there. We reached before e club was opened. When it was my turn, e person was staring hard at my ic! As if i'm nt e person on e card like thatXD okay haha. I can really confirmed that its nt my place. Then mr ong n lishan came, lol. Mr ong is really sort of sieh alr, jess alsoXD okay anyway we met up wif e guys later, they're at arena. Tok to them awhile n went for bak kut teh! lol quite nice la e soup. Then e guys came n joined us later. Wondering where's sx? lol she noes where she is! =P hahaha but we're still contacting thru phone until my phone went out of batt. Then Mr Ong sent us home after that(lishan, jess, ch, myself).

Nxt day met up with sx, wt, 3sa, win. Seoul Garden(: Lol i think we were one of e patrons that sat there for quite some time! Thxs all for celebrating my bd with me(: Ur presence is enough(: Eating makes ppl happy i always think so(: When i got e photo i'll upload(: Yea n we went home after eating(: Shuxin thxs for everything[lol its u-know-what] Watched tv till my little aunt returned home with her husband. Then at one pt of time i tot they are going out to buy their stuff with my another aunt. lol until they came home with a cake(: lol that's so sweet okay(: N i'm glad that i finally told them wat i had been hiding for e past 3 months. Well it felt gd after that. At least i'm nt hiding anything from them alr.

On e 5th met up with mimi, sarah, jerm, ger, aa, hr! N we were supposed to meet at e airport hahaha n i got to know on that day it was my bd celebration. Anyway we went to the cathay at astons for dinner. After hearing how nice it was from mel, i'm finally there! LOL! E baked potato was yummy!! Sarah's recommendation! haha n while waiting for jerm, ger n aa, coz jerm n aa rushing their assignment! Then hr suddenly went missing, i tot he was going to bring them to e place, indeed, but they turned up with a cake(: LOL it was rather hard to describe how i felt coz its like a total surprise!! Dint expected that as they're alr rushing here n all!! Really really thanks(: I'm grateful for meeting them in my sec 3 sec 4 period seriously, n that our friendship continued(: its great(: Then we went slacking, taking photos n all(:

Overall, it was a great birthday(: Had a lot of first times this yr. Thanks all who wished me regardless on friendster, by msg or verbally. Thanks those who are there to celebrate with me(: U all made my day(: N its really e thoughts that count no matter how u did it(: Really thanks(:

Initially this yr, i tot my bd is gonna be a very special one, not that e way of celebration is very special or watever, is coz got this special person. But yea, not anymore. But i noe the friends who are always there, will be always there(: Family too. 18 alr, its rather fast n still doesn't seem like i'm of that age, as in in terms of maturity, mentality... Maybe i'm still a little childish deep in haha. But still i gotta learn to face with another phase of my life. Yup n i believe one will improve n be better as u learn n see more n with more exp. Yup so thanks everyone who had been a part of my life, regardless whether u're just a temp passenger on my train of life, or u're a permanent guest(: Thanks(:



This is life@
4:43 PM
♥Sunday, December 07, 2008