Sometimes i think i fail terribly as a friend. Sorry.
Life is e same. So i've got nth to say. Sian is e word.
Hate my life now, i nv expected it to be this way when i first stepped into the college. Not only academically wise. There's other aspect that makes me feel that i'm inferior in a way or another. Nt trying to be better, i just want to fulfill e expectations i had for myself. I get e mood to do work at times, n sometimes i'll just slack my day off. Consistent is nv my kind of thing. That's why i'm suffering now. Mr Ong always ask, "when are u going to sit down and start studying?" if i could i would not be in this state today. He asked Ms Tan when i'm gonna quit CO... I dun wan him to bug her. Its really a nuisance. I'm like bringing trouble to everybody beside me.
I need some where and some time for myself. Its like 2 more weeks to block test. And i dun think its gonna be smooth. Hard time ahead. I really feel like ponning sch n to put aside all my responsibilities for just one day. It may just be a turning point for me.
This is life@
9:15 PM
♥Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Today is a long day XD
The feeling of lost n found again is just great(:
THANKS BABY(: for helping mi call comfort company(:
N OF COZ SHUXIN(: No other words can really express my gratefulness!! BIG BIG THANK YOU(:
This is life@
9:26 PM
♥Wednesday, February 20, 2008
CO day yesterday. But after CO there's cip. We went to e old folk's home n performed new yr songs(: Seriously speaking, since sch started, i nv once felt that my life is meaningful. N its really no life. I mean we dun even get to go out after sch. No idea whether its just us or wat. But most of our time are devoted into homework n CCA. Whenever i got home i'll just fell asleep, most of the time is because i'm doing my homework. So in e end, my work is nt done. Going to e old folk's home sort of make me feel that my life is actually of some meaning again. I like doing meaningful things. Some can say that studying is meaningful coz its for e sake of future n blah blah blah. But no its not that case for me. When over-studying occurs, studying becomes just for e sake of studying but nt learning something new.
Yesterday, after CO we went to e old folk's home, its somewhere near Yishun MRT station. Sree Narayana i think. When we arrived, i think e volunteer that has been contacting Ms Tan, mr gary neo's brother i think, gave us some instructions. Went to e hall, took out instrument n tune, put aside, waited for more instructions. Its e first sight i saw that really shocked me. The old folk's are just pushed outside their wards, sitting on their wheelchair n are aligned so neatly. Its seriously sad that its their everyday life.
After that we were instructed to help bring e elderlys down to e hall for e concert. Maybe its e first time i've really been into an old folk's home n that explains e novice feeling or wat. But i'm quite excited actually. So we took e wheelchair handle n wheeled them from outside e wards to e hall, took lift of coz.
There's this very cute n hyper old lady, she super high! Then estelli wheeled her. Then i was like saying she's very cute. Estelli n Zhiwen told me that e old lady says that "ke ai mei you yong, hai zi ye shi bu yao wo" then she says she dun want say anymore later she cries. Then she covered her eyes. I felt so bad can. N i noe this afterwards when i said like for dunno how many times coz she really very hyper. All along in my mind was why she kept covering her eyes. I tot she was playing! Sorry.
After pushing them to e hall, jess n i wanna go interact wif e old ppl. haha. Coz e concert haven start yet, so we went to tok to some of them. After toking to a few, we went to e old lady. She was so high n saying that she'll wave along when we performed. N i'm glad that i noe a bit bit canto coz she's a canto! Then can converse a bit with her. N busy translating also! She kept telling me her name but i dunno wat it is in chinese. After e concert we wheeled them back to their wards.
They were also once young n agile like us. N it definitely nv occur to them that bringing up their children would result in being abandoned by their children today. Its really saddening to see that. Hearing it over e news n all its nt felt so deeply when you really see it for urself. One held my hand tightly in e hall when she said she's cold, n she's really cold. I hope they'll feel some warmth with our visit, nt only physically but in e heart also(: If there's a nxt time, maybe i'll go back n pay a visit. N after A's, maybe i'll go be a volunteer. I see it more meaningful a life, then mine which kept living in e past n pondered over things that already happened.
this is e hyper old lady, sticking out her tongue=P
i hope she stays healthy n happy(:
This is life@
11:38 AM
♥Sunday, February 17, 2008
HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR DEAR ALL(:
CO's got quite a number of new J1s. N two are especially prominent lol! Kept asking mi to blog abt them lol!
This is ZHIWEN(:
Wearing an oversized shoe><
E middle one is Estelli(: Yangqin player also(: N she's so long that her arm when compared to mine is like 3/4 palm longer!
They make ppl high very easily lol(: N are fun ppl to be with(: I'm always enjoying my time wif them(: N of coz with CO pals, like JESS n WEIJIAN(:
So yup here are e two of them(: hahaha.
I've DONE MY JOB(: ZHIWEN, FASTER SEND ME PHOTOS!!! (:
This is life@
10:29 AM
♥Thursday, February 07, 2008